12 Go-To Helps When Heartache Hits

Friends, heartache hits all of us. At one time or another.

Sometimes it feels like we’re still riding one wave of heartache when another wave hits. Seems like we may never again glimpse a peaceful shoreline.

If we live long enough you and I will stare down many harbors of heartache. The burial of a loved one. Betrayal. The loss of a career. A chronic illness. Financial disaster. The list is long.

If we live long enough you and I will stare down many harbors of heartache. Click To Tweet

Right now you might feel stuck in a season of sorrow. Or have a friend who is camped in a hurting place. This resource is for you.

When we’re facing mountains of mourning, having a plan of action in place can help. Think of a list of practical options as a necessary distraction filled with purpose and promise.

While there are no quick fixes for heartache, this is me coming alongside you with 12 suggestions or helps for reducing the sadness, even if it’s only for a little while, one session at a time.

While there are no quick fixes for heartache, this is me coming alongside you with 12 suggestions for reducing the sadness, even if only for a little while. Click To Tweet

1. Adjust Your Schedule. You may need to give yourself some space to process the present and prepare for your next steps. Choose perspective over productivity.

When faced with mountains of morning, choose perspective over productivity. Click To Tweet

2. Rest Yourself. Grieving is emotionally and physically draining. Lack of sleep can cheat you during seasons of stress, so give yourself permission to sleep in or take a nap.

3. Focus on Prayer. Take your heartache to God in prayer. You might try writing out your prayers. Even when you can’t find words, go to God in prayer. In Romans 8:27, we have the promise of One who intercedes for us–the Holy Spirit.

4. Take Your Grief Outside. Go for a walk. Sit in the shade or in the sun with a hat on and breathe in some fresh air. A change of scenery can serve as a healthy distraction or redirection.

5. Retreat With Your Bible. Water your spiritual roots with promises from God’s Word.

Water your spiritual roots with promises from God's Word. Click To Tweet

For encouragement and spiritual fortitude meditate on Scripture. These five verses are a good place to start.

“Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5b

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10

“The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.” Psalm 18:2

“Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.” Colossians 4:2

“If any of you lack wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” James 1:5

6. Turn On Some Tunes. When you can’t find your voice to sing, truth-full music can soothe a sad soul. Here are three songs you might check out: Hills and Valleys by Tauren Wells, Tell Your Heart to Beat Again by Danny Goeke, and Trust in You by Lauren Daigle.

7. Choose Silence. Over-stimulation can sneak up on us, especially when our hearts are heavy. Turn off the TV and timers. Put your phone on do-not-disturb mode. Choose silence, for at least 10 minutes. Thirty minutes of silence can bring even more peace with the quietness.

8. Recruit Prayer Partners. When people know you’re hurting, they long to help. Ask them to pray for you. Knowing others are standing with you in prayer will provide the support you need the most.

9. Try Something New. You may not have the head-space for this until more time passes but when you’re able. look for a creative outlet. Rock art, watercolor, knitting, playing an instrument, join a book club–something that will make a way for expression and distraction.

When sorrow hits you may not have the head-space for this until more time passes but when you're able, look for a creative outlet. Click To Tweet

10. Ask For Help. God doesn’t design us to do life alone. Don’t hesitate to seek godly counsel from wise women in your circle of friends. And don’t count out going to a Christian counselor or joining a support group.

11. Forgive. Friends, family, and strangers, no doubt well-meaning, will hand out platitudes like they were breath mints to cure something as simple as bad breath. Don’t let wounding words frustrate you and fester, forgive.

12. Practice Gratitude. Keep a list in your phone of people and things you are thankful for. Add to the list at least once a day.

“I will praise the LORD, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.” Psalm 16:7

Gratitude and offering praise shifts our focus from the circumstance to our sovereign God who is at work in and through our heartache.

 

Four other posts you might find helpful . . .

9 Psalms to Bolster You on a Bad Day

When Your Plans Go Sideways: 3 Secrets to Finding Your Feet Again

12 Verses to Pray Over a Hurting Friend

7 Truths for Stabilizing Your Steps into the Unknown

One more thing . . . I’d be grateful if you would share this post with someone you know who is hurting?